If there’s one message I could share with the entire world, it’s the one encapsulated in this post. I used the word “consistency” a bunch in my first post, and I’ll continue to reference the lessons here in majority of posts in the future.
In a world full of changes that bring anxieties, uneasiness, frustrations, etc. we all cling to what’s comfortable. In a world where the only constant is change, we all want familiarity. It’s human nature. But where do we find these comforting aspects in our every day lives?
Believe it or not, it starts with you. You don’t need to search the world for comfort that you can provide yourself with.
Other people are always going to notice how you feel, how you look, what your body language is, and so on and so forth. Odds are, those elements of your character are exponentially more noticed by the people below you if you’re a boss, leader, coach, etc. And, as sad as it is, if you’re in a position of respect or power, there are also people that are waiting to see you fail, whether that’s a co-worker, classmate, teammate, or peer. Misery loves company.
With that being said, find your consistent emotions and stick to them. Think with both hope and humility. Here’s what I mean…
If there’s a horrible day that comes along and really kicks your ass, don’t show the world. Don’t mope, or pout, or tell Facebook how horrible your day was. There are truly miserable people out there that love to see that. Never give them that satisfaction. Keep that same “just another day” emotion when facing the world. The heavy majority of people you come across every day just do not care about your problems. At all. Don’t complain to them. Your closest family and friends are the people you can confide in when times are tough. If you do your best to not show everyone else how defeated you may feel, it makes the rough days easier to get through because you’re feeding off of your own spirit and discipline. Manifest your own faith that you control your happiness.
The same thing applies for the amazing days. If everything is going right, and you feel like you can walk on water, take a step back and level yourself. If you make it obvious to the world that you’re having one of your better days, they’ll take notice. In turn, your average or bad days will eventually be evident once your overwhelming excitement disappears. Again, celebrate your triumphs with those closest to you, because nobody else really cares. Your successes, promotions, winnings, etc. create envy in people around you. It’s sad, I get it, but that’s our world. Instead of having to decipher who these toxic people are, just don’t show them your elation, keep everything business as usual.
I call this concept staying on line. If you can maintain a joyful, stoic, and confident attitude through each and every day, you’ve created your own consistency. You don’t have to look to anyone else for happiness or love or pride, because you hold your own keys to those things. Making this attitude habitual will get you out of bed on days you don’t feel like getting up.
Let me try to give a personal anecdote on this… I’ll shorten the story to make my point. I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes on November 8th, 2018, which was a Thursday. I went to the hospital that night and stayed overnight until I was released Friday evening. At the point of my release, only about 15 people know about my diagnosis, my closest nine friends, my immediate family, and my new doctors. Saturday morning, November 10th, we head out of town for a cousin’s wedding with my entire extended family… without any of them knowing what the previous two days had consisted of. I say this because that moment and that weekend aren’t about me. It’s about celebrating a marriage, not being upset over my own major lifestyle change. I had to handle it and move forward without changing my demeanor, throwing a pity party is selfish. I had to go back to school on Monday and do the same thing. There was no reason to project my problems onto anyone else. The important people in my life knew, or would soon find out, so there was no reason for me to tell everyone at my English table on Monday morning.
Anyways, making this habitual will also help you to build more solid relationships with those around you, because your consistency yields trust and respect from the right type of people. The right type of people will care by choice, not by you force-feeding them your daily issues. It will help you to filter negative people out of your life as well, because you won’t stoop to their levels of gossip or envy. You’ll be able to identify phony, two-faced people through their inconsistencies from person to person that they come across.
So, how can you find this happy medium to stick to? It’s definitely easier said than done, and it takes time to develop if you aren’t already equipped with it. But, I like to use a broader perspective. For example, according to the NCAA, only 2.2% of high school baseball players go on to play Division 1 baseball. If I don’t feel like getting up to lift or go to practice, shame on me, because that other 90-97.8% would do anything to trade places with me. There are people everywhere that would give anything to have a job, have kids, have a home, play sports, and on and on and on. So, do you really have to waste an entire day in dismay when you were late to work because your car got a flat tire? With all due respect, I don’t think so. We fail to realize that our worst days could be someone else’s hopes and dreams.
Therefore, keep joy in your heart, exude confidence, have hope, and stay humble. Find your line of consistency day in and day out and stick to that. You’ll create a standard for yourself that will elevate the other aspects of your lifestyle.
Thank you for continuing to follow along. Until next time,
-B.F.
Super 8 